Church committees

Tramp96

1:56p, 2/4/24

I know I'm not as regular of a poster in this forum as most of you, so I beg your indulgence on this.

I'm starting to think that being on a church committee could become the greatest threat to my spirit, and subsequently my faith, than anything from the outside world.

Right now I have to admit I'm not giving or serving with a joyful heart, and I find myself breaking the 8th commandment (or 9th depending on your numbering) quite easily. I'm not giving my fellow congregant the benefit of the doubt.

I took on chairing a committee because I was asked to. I did it out of a sense of obligation. But I fear I will harbor sinful resentment to a couple of people as a result of being on this committee.

Talk me off the ledge. And pray for us.

dermdoc

2:28p, 2/4/24

In reply to Tramp96

Tramp96 said:
I know I'm not as regular of a poster in this forum as most of you, so I beg your indulgence on this.

I'm starting to think that being on a church committee could become the greatest threat to my spirit, and subsequently my faith, than anything from the outside world.

Right now I have to admit I'm not giving or serving with a joyful heart, and I find myself breaking the 8th commandment (or 9th depending on your numbering) quite easily. I'm not giving my fellow congregant the benefit of the doubt.

I took on chairing a committee because I was asked to. I did it out of a sense of obligation. But I fear I will harbor sinful resentment to a couple of people as a result of being on this committee.

Talk me off the ledge. And pray for us.

Have served on just about every committee at a Baptist church. Worst was being head of Personnel committee. Deciding clergy who are friends salaries is pretty stressful

I will admit a lot of my serving was out of guilt and obligation.

Got closer to the Lord and learned to say no. And realized that there was always somebody else. It is tough especially if it is the hometown church you grew up in.

Listen to the Holy Spirit.

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Pro Sandy

9:18a, 2/5/24

I've been in your shoes. It is tough. There is a reason not all are called to leadership in the church. You see the ugly side that most don't. It is hard work.

But it is very rewarding. Remember why you are serving. Because God has called you to sheppard His people. To love them, encourage them, teach them, to support the mission of making disciples.

Spend time in the Word, pray, practice spiritual practices. The human functions required in church leadership will wear you down. Have a couple of guys from church you regularly get with to share and encourage.

Remember to strive with your fellow leaders, not against. Seek unity even at the expense of what you might want done. Be humble and forgive easily and repent quickly.

dermdoc

12:44p, 2/5/24

In reply to Pro Sandy

Pro Sandy said:
I've been in your shoes. It is tough. There is a reason not all are called to leadership in the church. You see the ugly side that most don't. It is hard work.

But it is very rewarding. Remember why you are serving. Because God has called you to sheppard His people. To love them, encourage them, teach them, to support the mission of making disciples.

Spend time in the Word, pray, practice spiritual practices. The human functions required in church leadership will wear you down. Have a couple of guys from church you regularly get with to share and encourage.

Remember to strive with your fellow leaders, not against. Seek unity even at the expense of what you might want done. Be humble and forgive easily and repent quickly.

Amen

No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.

ChaplainMCH

3:20p, 2/5/24

In reply to Tramp96

Tramp96 said:
I know I'm not as regular of a poster in this forum as most of you, so I beg your indulgence on this.

I'm starting to think that being on a church committee could become the greatest threat to my spirit, and subsequently my faith, than anything from the outside world.

Right now I have to admit I'm not giving or serving with a joyful heart, and I find myself breaking the 8th commandment (or 9th depending on your numbering) quite easily. I'm not giving my fellow congregant the benefit of the doubt.

I took on chairing a committee because I was asked to. I did it out of a sense of obligation. But I fear I will harbor sinful resentment to a couple of people as a result of being on this committee.

Talk me off the ledge. And pray for us.

Tramp96,

This is so awesome of you to share. Thank you. I'm strengthened by your convictions and vulnerability. I have felt similar misgivings in the past.

There is a whole dialogue you should go through with someone you trust, to work through this.

Try to focus on why you felt obligated. Where did that sense come from? Could it have been towards pleasing a particular person or perhaps something greater, like towards God?

Base on that, you might find that as already recommended, finding God in prayer would be most beneficial. Perhaps asking God to help you find HIM in the committee, in the work done therein, and in the people there. Don't look for good feelings necessarily, but the consolation of knowing perhaps you are doing God's work. Remember, Jonah didn't want to go, and he was even ticked off at God at how it was handled. That is to be a lesson to us, to soften our hearts, and let God be.

St. Mother Theresa once said, "True love is love that causes us pain, that hurts, and yet brings us joy. That is why we must pray to God and ask Him to give us the courage to love."

It is difficult to write as if I was in your presence. However, it is a necessary skill. Communication should be full of smiles, respect, and a desire to relate. If you cannot relate to me, and I to you, there is little chance of us positively influencing each other.

BluHorseShu

3:33p, 2/5/24

In reply to Tramp96

Tramp96 said:
I know I'm not as regular of a poster in this forum as most of you, so I beg your indulgence on this.

I'm starting to think that being on a church committee could become the greatest threat to my spirit, and subsequently my faith, than anything from the outside world.

Right now I have to admit I'm not giving or serving with a joyful heart, and I find myself breaking the 8th commandment (or 9th depending on your numbering) quite easily. I'm not giving my fellow congregant the benefit of the doubt.

I took on chairing a committee because I was asked to. I did it out of a sense of obligation. But I fear I will harbor sinful resentment to a couple of people as a result of being on this committee.

Talk me off the ledge. And pray for us.

Remember you're still dealing with imperfect people. Pray, follow the Holy Spirit in performing your role with charity/love and don't expect everything to be rosy all the time. Serving is serving and at the point where the stress of it is spilling over into your personal life....maybe look for other opportunities to serve.

I think we all have made the mistake of assuming church committees will always involved rational people who are always focused on unselfish and charitable goals. People are still people. Remember too that even the apostles fought.

jaborch99

9:22p, 2/5/24

In reply to Tramp96

Tramp96 said:
I know I'm not as regular of a poster in this forum as most of you, so I beg your indulgence on this.

I'm starting to think that being on a church committee could become the greatest threat to my spirit, and subsequently my faith, than anything from the outside world.

Right now I have to admit I'm not giving or serving with a joyful heart, and I find myself breaking the 8th commandment (or 9th depending on your numbering) quite easily. I'm not giving my fellow congregant the benefit of the doubt.

I took on chairing a committee because I was asked to. I did it out of a sense of obligation. But I fear I will harbor sinful resentment to a couple of people as a result of being on this committee.

Talk me off the ledge. And pray for us.

I once could have made a very similar post, except for instead of serving on a church committee, it was serving as a pastor. 10 years in different ministry roles showed me more "behind the curtain" than my spirit could handle. So without leaving the church, I left ministry. I never lost my belief that God primarily works to accomplish his will through the church, so I could not let myself abandon her either (although the denomination I affiliated with changed), but I realized that just because the church was doing something didn't mean God was behind it. So by stepping out of professional ministry, I am now able to join God's work where I see it being done. While I would never continue with a church that I thought had abandoned her commitment to Jesus, I think most churches get their priorities out of order from time to time and pursue things that are more about self-preservation than bringing heaven to earth. When that happens, I can devote my energies and resources to the things that most clearly have the fingerprints of Jesus on them.

Humbly submitted in hopes that my experience may be able to help you as you discern your next steps.

dermdoc

6:40a, 2/6/24

In reply to Tramp96

Prayed for you this morning.

No material on this site is intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. See full Medical Disclaimer.