Cringiest wedding things you've seen

29,170 Views | 195 Replies | Last: 9 hrs ago by Tobias Funke
Ghost of Bisbee
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AG
Bridezilla and her partner splitting this past week got me thinking, there have been some real cringe things I've seen related to weddings and I can't be the only one. What have you seen? Here's a few I've been lucky enough to experience:

- Bridezilla calling out on social media the 17 who RSVp'd yes to her wedding and didn't show up thus losing $1200 on wasted food, then demanding they pay via cashapp
- Getting asked to BYOB on a wedding invite (yes I'm serious)
- A beauty and the beast graphic on an invite
- A groomsmen processing in to the reception with his +1 gf who wasn't part of the bridal party, then dabbing during that procession
- A lightsaber fight to the imperial march for the "first dance" between bride and groom. The groom's lightsaber broke in the middle of it and one of the groomsmen yelled out a dick joke

Also does anyone else look back on your wedding video, see the garter grab n toss, and also think "why"
Beer Baron
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AG
Saw Facebook pics of a skank from high school's Wild West themed wedding. She and all the bride's maids had full on saloon hoar garb.
Ghost of Bisbee
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Ooo I've got another one

Best man at another wedding left chocolate sauce, whipped cream, maraschino cherries, and one of those sensitive area Gillette shavers on top of the limo getaway car for everyone to see as the bride and groom did their sparkler run to the limo from the reception
C@LAg
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not "cringy". but dumb. my brother made all his groomsmen (incl me) wear full Scottish kilts/garb because the bridge is like... 25% Scottish.

Similar to this.



It was not that bad for an outdoor August wedding.

Was held on orcas Island so a nice cool sea breeze most of the day.

the guys all went commando and at one point were mooning the ferry traffic at the ferry landing.
maroon barchetta
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Classmate and longtime friend got married when we were maybe 22?

We all despised the woman that roped into marrying her. At their wedding reception, her dad announced that be would start the "dollar dance" and he sweetened the pot by pinning a Benjamin to her dress, and said that he expected every male in attendance to pony up some cash and dance with her.

After that dance she sat down with her bridesmaids and started ripping gifts open. Very tacky.

The post-reception party was at the home of the bride's parents. The dad asked for a round of toasts (pretty sure that happened at the rehearsal dinner).

The Best Man struggled through his toast talking about how great it was that our friend had this woman come into his life. How she was really cute. How lucky he was to have her marry him.

It had a lot of pauses and stutters and fake laughs and everyone in the room except the bride's parents knew he was lying. The bride stared him down the whole time.

It was bad.

They eventually divorced. Once they got married we pretty much made no effort to see them because she was just miserable to be around. His current wife is just lovely.
maroon barchetta
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C@LAg said:

not "cringy". but dumb. my brother made all his groomsmen (incl me) wear full Scottish kilts/garb because the bridge is like... 25% Scottish.

Similar to this.



It was not that bad for an outdoor August wedding.

Was held on orcas Island so a nice cool sea breeze most of the day.

the guys all went commando and at one point were mooning the ferry traffic at the ferry landing.


Too soon
maroon barchetta
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Here's another.

Bride and groom had been living together at least a year. Got married in a small Baptist church where the groom had attended irregularly as a youth. Pastor was accepting of their situation.

Bride's mother, who we will refer to as AWB (attention hooring beach), demanded that the bride spend the night before the wedding with her.

The next day as the ceremony is starting and we are all in position up at the altar, no bride. We had decided to wait a few minutes and start late but eventually started and hoped she would show at the last moment.

We stood there for awhile. 20-30 minutes maybe? The organ and piano players just kept playing.

Eventually the bride shows up, sobbing. Mascara running.

AWB comes in smiling. Found out later she had told the bride "I was late for my wedding, and you're going to be late for yours". She had picked up the bride at the apartment she shared with the groom the day before so the bride wouldn't have an escape.

AWB was wearing a hot pink cocktail dress that was slit up the side and low cut to show off her pretty impressive girls. "Never wear anything that will take attention away from the bride." Unless you are AWB.

The mother of the groom stared laser beams at AWB the entire ceremony. She never once looked forward. She was pissed.

The flower girl at some point said "this thing hurts" and took off the little flower tiara thing on her head and spiked it down the steps of the altar.

The maid of honor realized she didn't have the groom's ring. She asked the other bridesmaids if they had it and the one on the end asked the piano player to go to the room where they dressed and look in purses.

She ran out and dumped purses in the floor in the room where they dressed until she found the ring and ran back in with it.

At the reception in the church gym, AWB was crying big crocodile tears and wailing that she couldn't believe her baby was married and leaving her behind.

My eldest aunt told her "oh, bullsheet. You've been waiting for this day for years. All y'all do is fight. She can't stand you and you can't stand her. STFU."

I miss my aunt.
maroon barchetta
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More?

Same groom as last story is getting ready for ceremony #3. I really did not want him to marry this gal but it's hard to intervene on something like that.

They plan an outdoor wedding. In August. On the coast. At an historic plantation where few buildings have air conditioning.

There are various slowdowns and snafus (bride had some trouble with the high dollar platform tennis shoes she bought to wear under her dress that would keep her from stepping on her gown and from sinking into the grass like she would with heels since the wedding was, you know, OUTSIDE IN AUGUST IN TEXAS and she would be walking on the grass.

At some point before the ceremony all of us groomsmen were in some little outbuilding sweating our butts off and waiting for the signal to assemble and walk up to our positions.

My pager goes off (this is the late 90's). It's my ex-gf. We have a little time before the music starts so I call her and ask if it's an emergency and can I talk to her later because I'm about to be in a wedding ceremony.

She says "Wait, is _____ actually marrying _____? That poor damn idiot."

Yeah. We all thought that.

At the reception, as the bride and groom are getting ready to leave and go to Houston to spend the night at a hotel and fly out to Jamaica or somewhere the next day, they start opening all of the gifts that look like cards. They are looking for cash or checks. They had overspent on everything. They needed money to take on their trip.

It was prophetic for the way the marriage turned out.

I liked wife #2. Didn't care for 1 or 3. Number 4 is wonderful and I hope is that last one.

The groom is like a brother to me. But you can't tell him who to marry. He did say after number 3 "I think my picker is broke".

I told him to be careful how he says that.
maroon barchetta
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There are others. I'll stop for now.
et98
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AG
A groomsman (groom's little brother) threw up all over the bride & groom in the middle of the wedding. I was also a groomsman. We all caught quite a bit of splatter.
AgResearch
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AG
Cousin ended the reception by taking the mic and exclaiming the party is ending now so she can go have sex with her husband.
jwoodmd
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Couple:

Brother-in-law marries into a heavy duty Baptist family (bride was chill, drank, and ok). Baptist family (had a couple ministers in it) insisted on a dry reception. Of course there was a "food prep" area that only the Baptist family and friends were allowed. Never smelled so much bourbon coming from coffee cups, falling down drunks, and one of the Baptist ministers got a DWI on the way home.

Wife was a bridesmaid for a lifelong friend. Groom was weird and so was his family. Arrived at the reception and only tables for the groom's family and groomsmen were reserved. As we arrived late due to photos there weren't any tables so we ate standing along with some of bride's family. As everyone was leaving, the bridal parties talked about doing some more socializing and drinks. Nope. Groom and groomsmen and their +1s had plans (cocaine and drug party). Bride calls wife about an hour later and says her sister and others were going out as the groom and his male friends were going somewhere. Never seen or heard anything like this. Sure enough, four years later they divorce as he comes out of the closet and says he's gay.
Unemployed
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AG
maroon barchetta said:

There are others. I'll stop for now.
Thanks.
Ginormus Ag
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Not a wedding party story but just a weird thing my wife experienced at a wedding she went to.

It was 6//7/2008. A popular date to get married. My best man got married that day and my wife's maid of honor got married that day, both were in Dallas. Wife has to go to wedding as a maid of honor to her life long friend. I have to go to my best man's wedding as a groomsman.

At the reception the head table is only for the bride and groom. My wife being an odd number guest gets placed at a table with this family of 5 she knew who were also friends of the bride. The meal is buffet style, so tables are called in order. My wife's table gets called, they all fill there plates and sit. My wife is eating and all of a sudden, the dad says, "Pass" and each person in the family passes their plate to the person to their left. My wife is thinking WTF!? A few more minutes go by, and the father again says, "Pass". And they all pass their plates to the left again. They do this through the entire meal until each person had ate everything on every plate. My wife said she had never been so grossed out and confused at the same time. What is the point of doing that? And with a buffet!?

We also went to a cousins wedding in August years ago where the wedding and reception was at the same place. Wedding started at 3:00. Was over by 3:30. Everyone is asked to go into the reception building while the wedding party takes pictures. We go in, no assigned seating. We are waiting and see that the pictures have concluded. It then becomes, 5::00, no immediate family, no wedding party show up. There is no bar, no drinks, even no water fountain in the building. 6:00 rolls by. Nothing. Just a building full of people not in the wedding waiting. Like 300 people. 7:00. People being to leave. At 7:45 the caterer shows up and begins to put out food, but still no drinks. People ask the caterer for drinks. Their only response is, "We're working on it." At 8:00 the DJ comes in and the announces the family and wedding party, then the father daughter dance, then the mother son dance, then the first dance, then the family and wedding party and family are all poured Champaign for the endless toasts. You could see people are visibly pissed at this point because we had nothing to drink and it is almost 9:00. After the endless toasts they finally open the food line and people begin to ask where the drinks were. Nobody wants to be the person to question anything and ruin the wedding. Finally the caterer brings out tea, but no ice. About 209 people have left at this point, but we couldn't because we were "family". Also my cousins grandmother is going through cancer treatments at this time and is the sweetest nicest lady in the world and nobody in our family wants to upset what may be her last memory of our family being together.

Come to find out, the immediate family and bridal party had their own private meal in anther room so that they could eat without being disturbed by the guests. It was an "oversight"by the wedding planner and communication between her and the caterer as to why there was no food or drinks for the other guests.
Beer Baron
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AG
A friend of a friend broke up with his fiance after invitations had already gone out. Wedding canceled. A few months later they get back together and send out the same invitations with the old date scratched out and the new one written in. Weirdly, they're still together but almost certainly swingers.
Ghost of Bisbee
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lol

the "pass" story is wild

I mean, what??
maroon barchetta
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Good grief at all those stories.

They ate for five hours?
wangus12
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AG
Only "odd" thing I've ever seen at a wedding was my cousin's husband froze at the altar when it came to the vows. Thought the poor guy had a stroke or something. Stood there for a solid 5+ minutes before finally saying "I do".

They been married 20 years so its been all good since then
Krazykat
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Just a couple weddings where the bride and groom got sloppy drunk at the reception to the point it was embarrassing for them.
Ginormus Ag
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They had their own private dinner in another building for 3 hours. We were supposed to be served food and drinks at the same time, but the caterer didn't get that instruction, was the excuse.
Tecolote
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Ginormus Ag said:

They had their own private dinner in another building for 3 hours. We were supposed to be served food and drinks at the same time, but the caterer didn't get that instruction, was the excuse.
We had another wedding reception feed many of our guests. Our reception was at the Club Giraud in SA and parking was somehow shared with another reception at another place adjacent/near to the Club. A whole bunch of our wedding party just followed the crowd, got in line for food and drinks and after a while they were wondering why they didn't recognize more people and where we were - and then one friend looked at the embossed napkins and says "holy ****, we're at the wrong reception"
maroon barchetta
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Brother Shamus
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Ginormus Ag said:

They had their own private dinner in another building for 3 hours. We were supposed to be served food and drinks at the same time, but the caterer didn't get that instruction, was the excuse.


lol - they probably never even planned to feed anybody and thought they were being clever. I can't stand cheap and manipulative people.
CDub06
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AG
Had a wedding where the ceremony started an hour late. We sat in the reception hall trying to entertain our 4 year old. As a very punctual person, I was losing my mind at how discourteous and annoying this was.

Finally, the wedding party shows up and we have the show.

This being a white couple, they obviously had to involve their dog as the ring bearer. Apparently the dog jumped into a pond during pre-ceremony photos and they had to go wash and dry him before we could start the ceremony.
maroon barchetta
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Racist
thumbsup73
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You sure Levy wasn't the caterer????
Cromagnum
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Not necessarily at the same wedding.

- Having the dog be the ring bearer.
- Someone wearing white that's not the bride, leading to an argument.
- Drunken arguments / fights of any kind. (Some might argue that actually made the wedding better)
- Any type of cosplay wedding.
Cromagnum
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AG
Tecolote said:

Ginormus Ag said:

They had their own private dinner in another building for 3 hours. We were supposed to be served food and drinks at the same time, but the caterer didn't get that instruction, was the excuse.
We had another wedding reception feed many of our guests. Our reception was at the Club Giraud in SA and parking was somehow shared with another reception at another place adjacent/near to the Club. A whole bunch of our wedding party just followed the crowd, got in line for food and drinks and after a while they were wondering why they didn't recognize more people and where we were - and then one friend looked at the embossed napkins and says "holy ****, we're at the wrong reception"


That's awesome. LOL
one MEEN Ag
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AG
Went to a wedding where the bride's family is strict southern baptist, dad is a minister. No alcohol and no father daughter dance. But here's the kicker, the bride is a professional ballroom dancer. The replacement dance is a choreographed number between the bride and her professional ballroom partner (not the groom) about a couple on their wedding day and night. Had some intimate lifts and leg straddles in it. Was pretty eye opening.

On a lighter note, I went to a wedding at a venue kind of out in BFE north of houston. Met a lot of really good people, we had a blast that evening. Winding down, one of the groomsmen approached us and says, 'Y'all wanna go to the horniest place in texas?!' I'm kind of weirded out. Not interested in a strip club, no idea if thats even what he's asking. Nope, guy wanted us all to go out to Henrys Hideout off of 1774, where the whole ceiling is thousands of deer antlers. We went and continued to have a blast. Is a cool place by the way.
MouthBQ98
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Probably me at my brother's first wedding. I was best man but sick with the worst part of a bad cold. Drugged all up with cold meds yo try yo make it through the day. Wedding was fine. Reception was interesting because a huge thunderstorm blew up as everyone arrived and 50-60mph wind gusts blew away the outside decorations and knocked out the power for over an hour.
Someone handed me a beer or three during the long delay, and between the beers and drugs my impromptu best man speech contained many more words than necessary to get my pints across. Nothing bad or embarrassing, but finally some little inner voice of reason waded through the buzz and told me to STFU and wrap it up.
Claude!
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Less cringe and more unusual, but I attended a pagan wedding. Officiant invoked the four winds and asked Odin and Frigg to bless the union. Then everyone stood in a circle and a drinking horn was passed around. When you held the horn, it was your responsibility to say something nice about the couple and invoke the gods, at which point everyone shouted "Hail the [last name of groom here]!"

For the record, the officiant was allergic to latex and couldn't eat the catered barbecue, and the bride/groom dance was to Aerosmith's "Don't Wanna Miss a Thing".
maroon barchetta
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Did the bbq contain latex?
chjoak
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I come from a large family of Bohemian Texans that are all Catholic so I really should have more of these.......

Each bullet is a different couple.....

  • one of my older cousins got married at 19 so her parents would let her go out of state for college. she was divorced, miserable and back home within 2 yrs.
  • sister of the above started getting wedding fever a few years later when all of her female relatives around her were getting married (her sister + 3-4 cousins). she meets a guy from Massachusetts on Christian message board and is getting married 6 months after meeting face to face. he is/was a really weird guy. his mom was the only friend or relative of his that came down to TX for the wedding. the couple left the reception early (by my family's standards) and got pulled over for speeding (luckily neither had been drinking) less than a mile from the reception hall. they have 2 kids now. supposed to be getting divorced for the last 3-4 yrs but they still live together because they can't afford to live separately.
  • another cousin got knocked up by her boss and was having a "shotgun" wedding when she was 5 months pregnant. none of us were supposed to talk about that because they didn't want the younger cousins to know that she was pregnant at the wedding, despite the fact that it was VERY obvious by the size of her gut and the fact that she was standing at the alter doing the pregnant lady resting your hands on your belly thing. groom was sweating bullets the entire time. they were divorced within 2 yrs.


Last one separated so I can bullet point the details. sister to the "shotgun bride" married her high school sweetheart on MY B-DAY and asked me to be an usher.....

  • bride had a stomach bug. threw up twice before the ceremony and a couple times at the reception- groom and all of his groomsman (including the bride's underaged brothers) got completely sheetfaced
  • 3 bridesmaids (including "shotgun bride") got sheetfaced. They passed around a bottle of champagne during the grand march. 2 of them ended up dancing on a table. unfortunately there was no "show"
  • one of the drunk groomsman hounded me most of the night to pay my share of the bachelor party that I did not attend. his primary concern was covering the cost of the groom's lap dances from the nasty strip club they went to (worse than the dirty sock).
  • there were hundreds of empty smashed beer cans at the back of the hall that the younger kids were using to play some game where they were kicking them all over the place. the floor & kids were covered in beer.
  • hall was across the street from the police station. miracle that the groom didn't get busted for DWI as they left.
  • from what I was told both the bride (bug) & groom (drunk) puked their guts out soon after arriving at their B&B and promptly passed out. next morning they had a huge argument about him getting so drunk at their wedding. they are still married and have 3 kids.
Cromagnum
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AG
Quote:

3 bridesmaids (including "shotgun bride") got sheetfaced. They passed around a bottle of champagne during the grand march. 2 of them ended up dancing on a table. unfortunately there was no "show"


Now that's classy. LOL.
Claude!
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maroon barchetta said:

Did the bbq contain latex?
No, but the catering folks were wearing latex gloves, which was apparently enough. To be fair to the officiant, she didn't seem pissed about it or anything - just stuck out in my mind.
 
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