Reading these Adhd threads as a medicated 3rd grader through college has me feeling things.
Reading as a parent of a 4 yr old and i year old has me battling demons. I don't want to medicate and hope to engrain better skills/therapies to overcome the brain chemistry without pharma.
Max, love you man. Myself, I was at coach pitch tryouts and kept pestering a kid in the dugout to the point he swung a bat at my face. My dad was there, palmed the bat, and finally agreed with my mom to look at Ritalin and talk to a therapist.
Looking at the past from my perspective is so skewed, reliving it from the parents in this thread hurts.
I'd like to say I was at my peak form in very physical sports, karate was my favorite thing growing up and ingrained some morals in me I can't forget.
Team sports became viable when I was on meds, baseball SUUUUUCKED. SO MUCH FUGGIN DOWNTIME BETWEEN MINIMAL BURSTS EFFORT.
Don't make your adhd kids play baseball. You know a dog experiences time faster than humans and so do adhd kids, baseball is miserable. Stay focused, nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, BALL!!, stay focused nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, get shamed for noticing a dragonfly nearby. FML.
Wrestling, jiu-jitsu, karate, TKD, track, running, camping, swimming Swim Team!, soccer, lacrosse...
Sports requiring lots of movement and attention to minute changes in body language.
Teach them body language skills. We have so much attention it's just spread broadly. We see the details most ignore.
Adhders make great farmers and ranchers because we see the yellowing of a leaf that wasn't there the day before, we see the gait of an animal change after a nail or rock lodged in its foot. We see the emotions in someone's face when they feel disappointed or ashamed in our behavior, and the psyche is damaged over and over and over...
Medication changed my life. Did it delay my ability to thrive in chaos and mold it to my desire?
Teach your kids how to experiment, hypothesized and test their theory and thrust them into nature to grasp the world.
I don't know. I'm flailing about hoping I don't give my kids drugs, and I'm not judging those who do. I've been off meds for nearly as long as I was on then and it definitely gave me perspective I couldn't have gained without Ritalin/Adderall. I struggle with time still but have multiple businesses and entrepreneurial drive that cannot quit. My empathy is extraordinary and I pull people into my stream of consciousness through a combination of confidence and autistic honesty.
Working for others was always dull as there'd be a ceiling to bump against. Went through so many jobs (and gained immense experience in the process of different fields and business ideas) but was usually fired for some time issue or some busy-work issue I couldn't complete for my uppers.
Whatever you do with your adhd kids, love them completely. The most challenging ones are the best. If it was easy, what would be the point. God is challenging, take him to on it. You can do it.
Thanks for reading.
Edit: bunch of words with no tldr.
1. Get your adhd kids into activities that address their best attributes, minimize the others except to bring attention to what they lack for perspective.
2. Shame and disappointment from the people held in their highest esteem (parents/teachers/etc) play on an endless loop when things go wrong. It's like malware or bloatware on a computer.
3. Help set high goals/standards and incentivize the continual improvement in form or creativity.
4. If you set rules you better damn well be ready to justify the reasoning behind them. The constitution was created to hold the rule-makers back, and our predecessors didn't fight back against excessive rule-making strongly enough. It'll take a bastion of ADHDers to break our society of excessive rules and followers.
5. Don't discount their bravery. It may masquerade as something that looks scary... but your kid is an Explorer, an adventurer. They will jump into the darkness to see what's there and come out stronger. Teach them how to protect themselves and let them flourish, don't teach them how to be safe. Safety is an illusion that rule makers have propagandized you into believing. Learn how to wield the sword but keep it sheathed, unless.
Reading as a parent of a 4 yr old and i year old has me battling demons. I don't want to medicate and hope to engrain better skills/therapies to overcome the brain chemistry without pharma.
Max, love you man. Myself, I was at coach pitch tryouts and kept pestering a kid in the dugout to the point he swung a bat at my face. My dad was there, palmed the bat, and finally agreed with my mom to look at Ritalin and talk to a therapist.
Looking at the past from my perspective is so skewed, reliving it from the parents in this thread hurts.
I'd like to say I was at my peak form in very physical sports, karate was my favorite thing growing up and ingrained some morals in me I can't forget.
Team sports became viable when I was on meds, baseball SUUUUUCKED. SO MUCH FUGGIN DOWNTIME BETWEEN MINIMAL BURSTS EFFORT.
Don't make your adhd kids play baseball. You know a dog experiences time faster than humans and so do adhd kids, baseball is miserable. Stay focused, nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, BALL!!, stay focused nothing happens, stay focused nothing happens, get shamed for noticing a dragonfly nearby. FML.
Wrestling, jiu-jitsu, karate, TKD, track, running, camping, swimming Swim Team!, soccer, lacrosse...
Sports requiring lots of movement and attention to minute changes in body language.
Teach them body language skills. We have so much attention it's just spread broadly. We see the details most ignore.
Adhders make great farmers and ranchers because we see the yellowing of a leaf that wasn't there the day before, we see the gait of an animal change after a nail or rock lodged in its foot. We see the emotions in someone's face when they feel disappointed or ashamed in our behavior, and the psyche is damaged over and over and over...
Medication changed my life. Did it delay my ability to thrive in chaos and mold it to my desire?
Teach your kids how to experiment, hypothesized and test their theory and thrust them into nature to grasp the world.
I don't know. I'm flailing about hoping I don't give my kids drugs, and I'm not judging those who do. I've been off meds for nearly as long as I was on then and it definitely gave me perspective I couldn't have gained without Ritalin/Adderall. I struggle with time still but have multiple businesses and entrepreneurial drive that cannot quit. My empathy is extraordinary and I pull people into my stream of consciousness through a combination of confidence and autistic honesty.
Working for others was always dull as there'd be a ceiling to bump against. Went through so many jobs (and gained immense experience in the process of different fields and business ideas) but was usually fired for some time issue or some busy-work issue I couldn't complete for my uppers.
Whatever you do with your adhd kids, love them completely. The most challenging ones are the best. If it was easy, what would be the point. God is challenging, take him to on it. You can do it.
Thanks for reading.
Edit: bunch of words with no tldr.
1. Get your adhd kids into activities that address their best attributes, minimize the others except to bring attention to what they lack for perspective.
2. Shame and disappointment from the people held in their highest esteem (parents/teachers/etc) play on an endless loop when things go wrong. It's like malware or bloatware on a computer.
3. Help set high goals/standards and incentivize the continual improvement in form or creativity.
4. If you set rules you better damn well be ready to justify the reasoning behind them. The constitution was created to hold the rule-makers back, and our predecessors didn't fight back against excessive rule-making strongly enough. It'll take a bastion of ADHDers to break our society of excessive rules and followers.
5. Don't discount their bravery. It may masquerade as something that looks scary... but your kid is an Explorer, an adventurer. They will jump into the darkness to see what's there and come out stronger. Teach them how to protect themselves and let them flourish, don't teach them how to be safe. Safety is an illusion that rule makers have propagandized you into believing. Learn how to wield the sword but keep it sheathed, unless.